Gretchen’s story is one I’ve become so familiar with as I interview more incredible women like her, and welcome more members from around the globe to Sexy Sobriety.

So many of us found that we struggled with people pleasing, approval addiction, over-exercising, eating disorders, anxiety, and depression, before we even had the chance to pick up our first drink.

For a young girl, they’re some heavy burdens to bear! Not to mention what they do to our self-esteem and ability to really know and trust ourselves.

“Our frontal cortex isn’t fully formed until our early twenties. My addiction began at eighteen, so it’s taken me six or seven years to really become a full adult, in many ways. Like, how I process things, how I perceive myself… “

One of my favourite IIN lecturers, Daniel G. Amen, MD, Psychiatrist, founder of Amen Clinics, and one of the world’s foremost experts on applying brain imaging science to everyday clinical practice, concurs:
 
“If you want to be more successful in all aspects of life, you need to protect and take care of your brain… [Our] brains aren’t fully developed until about age 25. This is when the prefrontal cortex (PFC), the part of the brain that controls decision-making, judgment, forethought, focus and impulse control, among other functions, is considered fully developed.”
 
Gretchen recently celebrated 7+ years of sobriety and 8+ of recovery from an eating disorder. Hers is a story of not only healing, but of channelling her passions into a way to help others. Now happy and healthy, she devotes her days to helping other people to find more peace, wellness, and self-love.

“Everyone told me this, and you think, ‘oh I’ve got it figured out’. But you can’t love someone else until you love yourself. And it’s so clichéd, but it is SO true.”

Join us as we talk mental health, getting to the truth of who we really are, and the process of rebuilding our relationships with ourselves…
 

Gretchen Hoechner is a wellness consultant and public speaker in Nashville, TN. Having recently celebrated 7+ years of sobriety and 8+ of recovery from an eating disorder, she is an inspirational speaker for support groups, schools, churches, and other organizations that desire to learn more about addiction and reduce the associated stigma. She also works individually with people looking to improve their lives by taking a holistic approach, with resources, strategies and personalised programs in the areas of nutrition, exercise, and mindset.

Find Gretchen at  Get Healthy 615 :: Instagram :: Facebook :: Twitter

 
 
I recently had the honour of interviewing Approval Addiction Specialist, Amy Pearson from Live Brazen. One of the fascinating things she shared with me was a powerful tool she uses with her clients.

She explains it like this:

One third of the world will always be haters. No matter what we do, no matter how hard we try, no matter how fabulous our shoes are, they just won’t like us.

One third of the world will always be neutral. They could take us or leave us. Total indifference.

And one third of the world are our people. They totally get us, and think we’re the best thing since spiced olives.

The problem is we often spend wayyy too much time trying to win over the first two camps. We might dress differently, or speak differently, in an effort to get them to like us.

Carry on like this for too long, and we begin to forget who we are. Our sparkle fades. We become a shadow of our true selves.

Suddenly the third group can no longer recognise us as one of them. Heck, we barely recognise ourselves anymore.

And so we appeal to no-one. We feel isolated, disconnected, and lost. Losing ourselves further at the bottom of the bottle feels ever more seductive.

So how do we turn this train around?  This is one interview you won’t want to miss.  Join us as we talk approval, expectations, connection, and fulfilment – and how they relate to our drinking…

“It is human nature to want to feel connection – to want to feel safe in social groups… Safety trumps self-actualisation every time. That’s what we’re all looking for, but if you’re not feeling safe, you’re not going to start to be able to improve yourself and become that person you want to be.
 
And so many of us are going about it wrong. We’re settling for this false sense of belonging. We are changing who we are. We’re putting on a facade so that we can settle for faux belonging. And, as a result, our community, where we can really experience true intimacy for the first time, without ever having to try, they’re waiting there for us, and we don’t even know it, and they can’t even see it.”

Amy Pearson is a master certified Martha Beck life coach, a coach mentor and instructor for Martha Beck’s life coach training. She’s a teacher, coach, writer and speaker. A former approval addict (with the occasional relapse), she’s now addicted to success. Her mission is nothing short of world peace by empowering every heart-centered entrepreneur to magnify their tribe, make great money and an epic impact while doing their unique thing in the world.

Find Amy at LiveBrazen.com :: Facebook :: Twitter :: Pinterest Take the Approval Addiction Quiz at ApprovalQuiz.com